>> Friday, June 12, 2009
For my 40th “Friday Funny” post, I thought I’d get personal. I’m not making any of this up. Really. Here are Pharmie’s 8 Rules in the Bedroom:
1. There’s no such thing as “too many blankets.” Pharmie has 2 quilts on top of her, and then 1 more quilt that’s doubled up. She says she likes the weight on her.
2. Shoulders should NOT be uncovered once covered up. This makes Pharmie real cold real quick.
3. No making fun of someone who still sleeps with a “blankie.”
4. “Sleeping time” is time for sleep, “sexy time” is time for sex - do NOT confuse the two. I sometimes have trouble with this one...
5. When snuggling Pharmie, you can’t move away too quick, or she will practically shout “Ohh... so cold!...” Really. Most of the time she doesn’t know that she says anything.
6. Long, frequent backrubs. What, is she dreaming!?!?
7. Censored. If you know me well enough, you can ask me face to face (but Pharmie won’t let me answer). You might see me blush and squirm.
8. Cold body parts are not allowed to touch Pharmie. Good thing my crotch is always radiating heat.
9, 10, 11. Forgotten. There were 3 more, but we made this list laying in bed late one night. For the life of us, we can't remember the rest...
I, on the other hand, have fewer rules for the bedroom:
1. You must ask permission to play with my navel. It’s weird if you just start diggin around in there unannounced. Let me prepare myself. (Pharmie likes to play in there.)
2. The sheets must be tucked in. They should be properly secured at the feet. The tighter, the better. That’s what she said.
3. Don’t pile the bed with an obscene amount of blankets. That goes a little against Pharmie’s #1 rule. We find a way to cope.
4. Fluff the covers after a fart. I don’t want to baste in that stank for 7 hours - get it out from under the covers!
In other news, Pharmie and I got our race packets last night for tomorrows race. Here’s the short version of yesterday evening:
- First MN open water swim of the year (first OWS since NOLA)
- Sprained my thumb taking off my wetsuit (it freakin’ HURTS!)
- Ran into Mark B, Jeremy, and Jen at packet pick-up.
- Came home to eat Pharmie’s homemade guacamole.
Oh, and if you’re here for a “visual” Friday Funny, here’s a quick funny from StuffThatMakesMeChuckle.com:
Off to the races tomorrow!! Wish us luck!