Apple Duathlon Official Photos

>> Saturday, May 30, 2009

The official photos are in from the Apple Duathlon that Pharmie and I did a week ago.

Here I am starting the bike course, and I think I'm smiling at Totters who was cheering at the side of the road:

Here's Pharmie at the same point:

Here I am starting the second run:

And here's the final kick up the little hill to the finish line. Look at the crowd go wild:

Yeah, that was a joke about the "crowd going wild..."

Pharmie finished with that "I'm gonna barf" look on her face:

Here's a final photo that was included in my search for #252. I think the race photographers could have left this one out. I don't come across very well in this image:

Except for that last photo, you can see that my new SUGOi Tri Suit held up GREAT!! You'll be seeing it again at the Liberty Oly Tri in 2 weeks! Happy weekend everyone!


Friday Funny 38: Randomly Athletic and Inappropriate

>> Friday, May 29, 2009

It’s been a busy week. So (again) I stole these images from funny buddy Stevie Dee. They’re all slightly inappropriate, just the way I like it...

So check out I think it's pretty funny! Back with Apple Du race photos tomorrow. Happy weekend!!


5 Quick Things: Photos and Triathlon Club

>> Thursday, May 28, 2009

1: Cannon Falls Photos:
Matt’s girlfriend, Melissa, recently passed on some of her photos from the Cannon Falls Duathlon. Here I am coming into T1:

And here I am finishing:

Like I’ve always said, my hair seems to be slowing me down...

2: Gear West Photos:
There are no official photos of Matt or I as “Team Happy Pants” from the Gear West Duathlon, but here are 2 others. This is a photo from a friend of a friend showing me running (like I have to pee) at the start. The 2 guys near me were the speedy runners that beat me into T1:

And here’s an official photo that shows that final little jerk of a hill that’s about 300 meters from the finish line:

3: New Glasses:
I picked up my new glasses yesterday. My old ones have been held together with electrical tape for the past 3 weeks. The new ones are a little spunky and slightly retro. Here’s a photo of me sitting at my computer right now:

Yeah, I’m not wearing a shirt. So sue me.

4: CVA Triathlon Club Ride:
Yesterday, I had a quick CVA Triathlon Club ride. Many of the members are on a trip to New York, so I knew that we’d have a small turn out. It was just Cynthia, Rudy, and me:

I wanted to show them the Gateway Trail (one of my favorites!). Here they are crossing a bridge near the start of the Gateway:

We went out slowly: we hit mile 8 with a 10.5 mph average. Then Rudy picked it. He headed back between 17-19 mph. Here’s Rudy pulling ahead near our turn-around:

And here’s Cynthia nearing the end of the trail, with another 2 miles left to get back to school:

I’m planning a group run and a bike maintenance day next week, and we’re working out the details with the local Y to have a group swim lesson in 2 weeks. I CAN NOT wait for that!

5: Training:
At the Apple Duathlon this past weekend, Pharmie and I realized that we had 3 weeks to get ready for the Liberty Triathlon (she’s doing the Half IM, I’m doing the Oly). So we’re TRYING to hit it a little harder! I went on a fast 8 miler 2 days ago, and Pharmie went on a nice ride. Next week should be a lot of training! Stay tuned!!


Memorial Day Intervals

>> Tuesday, May 26, 2009

I hit the pool yesterday for some speed-work. I thought I'd do 16 repeats of 100 yards with 20 seconds rest between. Here's the first 8:


Feeling good. Feeling strong. The first few were smooth. They felt "right." Like my attraction to George Clooney. I was thinking I could MAYBE keep them all at or under 1:30. But then it started getting harder, and my form walked out on me. Here are my splits from my last 8:


I finished with a 1:30.19 / 100 yard average, which was pretty good! I wish I had my camera, because my "vein of approval" was out for quite some time after that workout!! I wanted to lift weights, but I was a little nauseous from pushing so hard in the pool. So I walked around the Y for a minute, stretched a little, and then decided to call it a day.

Back with photos of Pharmie and I from Saturday's Apple Duathlon as soon as they come out! Have a great short week!


Apple Duathlon 2009

>> Sunday, May 24, 2009

Yesterday, Pharmie and I headed up towards St. Cloud to do the Apple Duathlon in Sartell, MN. Apple is my “longest streak”: this would be my 4th straight year (and it was my first ever duathlon, so it holds a special place in my heart).

We arrived at the race site, and I figured I should try out my new SUGOi tri suit. I did NOT know if that tiny chamois would be enough to get me through those 21 miles on the bike! Pharmie grabbed a shot of me heading out on a quick test ride:

The verdict: the chamois was SUPER SMALL, but I needed to try doing the duathlon without an extra pair of bike shorts over the suit. Yesterday was supposed to be a TEST for the suit, and if something went wrong, well, then I’d know and I’d do something different for my oly tri in 3 weeks.

We went into the school, picked up our packets, got body marked, and headed back out. Here’s my traditional smiley face on my calf:

I went back into the school to use the restroom, and I realized that with a 1-piece tri suit, you need to get pretty naked to use the potty. So here I am sitting on the john nearly nude:

We went out and ran into Totters and her hubby Steve. Steve was doing the duathlon, and Totters was going to use the school’s track to get in a workout while we were all on the bike. Smart.

Pharmie and I got set up in transition. When we were nearly done, Pharmie started laughing as she was looking at my set-up. “What’s so funny?” I looked down and couldn’t figure it out:

Look next to my wheel in that photo above. Pharmie saw that there was a pantyliner in my transition area. “Uhh, yeah... I figured that be nice and absorbent - I’ll use that to wipe my face in T2...” Not really. But I did say that.

We were ready!

Here’s the school as everyone was standing around for the National Anthem:

(Note to participants: If you heard a car alarm going off 10 minutes before the Anthem and then again during the Anthem, it wasn’t me. Or maybe it was. Oops. Sorry.)


I was in Wave 3. Before the start, I looked over to Steve (Mr. Trotters) and wished him luck. We started off, and I noticed there was quite the competition this year. Last year, I hit transition in 6th place in our wave. This year, that was NOT going to happen! I was running strong in about 15-16th place in my wave. I missed mile 1, but I hit mile 2 in 11:51. I ran mile 3 in 6:01, and got back into transition in 18:19, which was about 13th in my wave. Faster than last year! Nice! But farther back overall. Dang.


Guess what? I had another rookie mistake in T1! I grabbed my bike and my shoes (that’s all), and started to run out. RIGHT at the edge of transition, there was a guy looking at me, tapping his head, and shouting “HELMET, HELMET, HELMET!!” Sh*t. My helmet was still sitting my in my transition area. I turned around, ran back to it, put it on, and took off again. I thought that was over and I had just lost a few seconds in T1, but this isn’t the last you’ll hear of this stupid little mistake.

33K BIKE (20.5 miles):

My goal for the days was to PUSH on the bike! We heard before the race that we’d have a tailwind on the last 9 miles back into town. That has NEVER happened before: the last 3 years have been a slap in the face around mile 12 where the wind just wants to push you backwards on the final stretch. This year, it would be at our backs. So I was going to push hard through the wind on the way out, and ride like a mother on the way back.

Miles 0-5: 16:55 (17.7 mph) into the wind
Miles 5-10: 16:41
Miles 10-15: 13:32
Miles 15-20 12:16 (24.5 mph!!) using the wind!
Last bit: 1:55

Those numbers show the story. I pushed pretty hard (but not too hard) on the way out, and had some decent numbers for riding into the wind. I started pushing REALLY HARD over the last 10 miles, and I really used the wind on the way back. My computer was reading 23-27 mph the whole time! And my SUGOi tri suit ended up being GREAT out there! I had 2 gels in the little pockets in the back. And the tiny chamois was just fine!! I couldn’t wear just that suit for a half IM, but I think it will be great for sprints and olys!!

I was really happy with my effort on the bike! I wanted to push hard and quiet that little voice in my head that is always saying “Yeah, but if you ease up a little on the bike, you could have a super impressive second run! Wouldn’t that be cool?” “Yes, it would be cool, but I might make up 60 seconds on the run. If I push hard on the bike, I can make up a few minutes. Do the math little annoying voice in my head. Now shut it.”

I finished the bike in 1:01:22, with a 20.0 mph average (20.6 on my computer). That was a BIG bite out of my 1:08 that I rode last year!! PR, here I come!


Nothing fancy. Racked my bike, threw on my running shoes, wondered what Lady GaGa will do to make her next album as fresh and entertaining as her current album, and I was running.


I looked at my watch after being on the run for about a minute. Last year at this time, I realized I could break 1:50:00 with a solid run. Now, I realized that with a SUPER fast run, I had a shot at breaking 1:40:00!! Last year, that time would have put me in about 4th place in my AG, so I was going to run my little ass off to see if there was a shot at placing in my AG (even though the intensity of everyone in the first run told me I didn’t really have a shot).

I was running my balls off. Not literally.

I hit mile 1 in 5:40. See? Running my balls off.

I hit mile 2 in 5:55. Nice. “You’ve got a shot at sub-1:40:00!”

I passed a few people just out of transition, but then there was no one for a few blocks. I caught up with a pack around mile 1, and then just kept picking people off. I was watching the AG markings on everyone’s calves, but I wasn’t passing anyone in my AG. “Come on Steve, you gotta go.” I was hurting, but I was still passing a lot of people and running strong.

I hit mile 3 in 5:51. I had just passed 2 people in my AG. FINALLY. I hit the edge of the parking lot, ran around transition, and booked it up the hill to the finish. I ran that final 5K in 18:28! And, I SQUEAKED under the 1:40 mark!!! 1:39:59!!


This is usually where I show my results. But first I need to explain something. I soon saw that I had received a 2:00 penalty. I was instantly upset. I figured it was for drafting (a common 2:00 penalty), but I rode CLEAN out there (and I think they need to verbally tell you that you received a drafting penalty, and I heard nothing). Once Pharmie and I got home, we decided that I’d e-mail the race director to see what was going on, and try to clear my good name. But then I looked at the official results and compared them to my watch. My T1 time (when I had to go back to get my helmet) was 1:11 on my watch. Officially, it was 0:43. I must have gotten RIGHT up to the timing mats on the edge of transition before I realized I was missing my helmet. So officially, I “exited” T1 and then came back in to get my helmet. 2:00 penalty. That explains it. Stupid me.

Anyway, here are my official results:

Steve Stenzel, St. Paul, MN, 28, M

In Age Group:
11 out of 24 (would have been 10th without the penalty)
5K: 18:19 (7th in AG), 5:54 pace
T1: 0:43
33K Bike: 1:01:52 (13th in AG) 19.9 mph
T2: 0:40
5K: 18:28 (4th in AG), 5:57 pace

Total: 1:41:59 (1:39:59 without penalty)

Non-Elite Males:

69 out of 193 (would have been 60th), 39th fastest first run, 101st fastest bike, 15th fastest second run

102 out of 308 (would have been 86th), 58th fastest first run, 146th fastest bike, 30th fastest second run

I was VERY happy with my overall effort at this race. I really pushed hard, and I found out that I can still finish strong (and upright) after racing so hard in the middle. This was a GREAT race for me. The penalty was just a little damper on a magnificent day!

Showing improvement is always nice too:
2006: 1:54:33, first du
2007: 1:54:36, had hoped to be faster
2008: 1:48:25, proud PR
2009: 1:39:59, another proud PR

So, I grabbed something to drink, and went to hang out near transition. I found Totters, and we cheered and talked. Soon, her hubby Steve came running in:

Then we spotted Pharmie. Here she is looking for the finish line:

I ran up to the finish line with her, and snapped a photo of her getting ready to cross the line, with an Apple PR!

Yay Hunnie!

After she finished, she snapped a photo of me in my SUGOi tri suit that passed it’s first test with flying colors:

We sat around, and I had 2 slices of pizza:

Then some nice woman sent from heaven came around with a huge box of cookies that were more frosting than cookie!! See?

We went inside for AG awards and the prize drawing, and I had to bring a hot dog and some bagel pieces with me:

Pharmie had some pizza:

Apparently, that woman behind her REALLY wants her pizza!...

Awards were about half done when they stopped for a few minutes. They asked everyone to go outside to cheer in the final physically challenged (PC) participant. It was SO COOL that they did that! Here he is crossing the line:

He had been out there for 4:26!! That’s a LONG day!! Way to go Aaron!!

We went back inside, didn’t win any of the raffle items from Gear West, and then hit the road. We both had a good race, but Pharmie’s groin was acting up. Hopefully that gets better soon, because she’s got a half IM in 3 weeks!! And I’m doing the Oly Tri at the same race! I’ll be sporting the new SUGOi tri suit again!

Race photos shortly! Have a good Sunday everyone!


Friday Funny 37: Two Outfits

>> Friday, May 22, 2009

I have 2 great ensembles to show you all. Yes, I said “ensembles.” Sue me.

Outfit #1: Blogger buddy Brian sent me an e-mail about 2 weeks ago. The gist of it was that he had some short shorts that he thought were TOO short. He wore them once, and thought he’d never wear them again:

He said that it was either send them to me, or donate them. I told him I’d GLADLY take them. They arrived in the mail a few days ago along with a note that said “Wear them in good health.”

They’re really not that short. I think my grey and blue running shorts I wore for my 5 miler on Wednesday are shorter. THANKS BRIAN!!

Outfit #2: I received another e-mail at about the same time from someone who does PR for SUGOi. (How do you pronounce that company? Sue-Gwee? Soo-Goi? I dunno...) Get this: they wanted to send me a new SUGOi Volocity Tri Suit to try out! SWEET!!

So guess what came in the mail recently?!?

It was harder than I thought to get in to! I do NOT have hips, and I had to “work it” over my hips! It fits well!

I thought I’d get a feel for it around the house. Here I am working on my porch in my new tri suit:

Here I am taking a poo in the suit. (Well, not IN the suit, you sicko):

Then I went outside to hang out with Kermit and Ella. Yes, out cats are in our backyard on leashes. They LOVE it. Really. Don’t judge me.

Then we all thought we heard a squirrel in the distance:

Turns out it was just a rustling leaf. No squirrel.

Thanks SUGOi!! I think I’ll give the Tri Suit a dry-run at the Apple Duathlon tomorrow! Then I hope to be able to wear it at the Liberty Olympic Tri in 3 weeks. In the meantime, I need to harden my ass for the small chamois in that suit!


Three Things

>> Thursday, May 21, 2009

• I STILL can't get over the sweet finish that Cathy Y had at the Gear West Duathlon last weekend! (Look a 2 posts down if you missed it.) I'm still a little in awe that I got to watch that whole situation play out as I was racing. I love the fact that you can compete in this sport right along side of some of the best-of-the-best. FREAKIN' LOVE IT!!

• Pharmie and I are getting ready to do the Apple Duathlon on Saturday! That's why I needed to hit the bike 2 days ago. Yesterday, I had a pretty good 5 mile tempo run in 31 minutes even. (Technically, 31 is odd, but... shut up. Just shut up.) I WAS going to swim today, but after a few intense days working on our porch, I figured I should just rest today and tomorrow. (And I'll show photos of the porch when I'm done.) Then we'll be ready to race on Saturday. Apple is a fun one! I'm looking forward to it!!

• Sorry I don't have photos of me in 2 new outfits like I promised. I'll take some (maybe slightly over-the-top) photos and get them up tomorrow as a "Friday Funny." Check back in 24 hours...


Freakin HOT Ride!

>> Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Yesterday, I tried and tried and TRIED to get motivated for a ride after getting home from teaching. I was finally ready after being home for about 2 hours of dragging my feet.

I grabbed Goldilocks (whom I haven’t touched for just over 2 weeks - since the “brake rubbing” incident during the Cannon Falls Duathlon), and I hit the road. It was HOT! The day topped out at 97 degrees! In May! In MN! And when I finished the ride around 8 pm, it was still 89 degrees!! Holy crap!

There were a LOT of people out there in the heat. I saw a granny biking in athletic shorts and a swimsuit - frankly, I saw a little too much. Then I saw a 20-something woman with great legs rollerblading in short shorts - frankly... I saw too little ...nope, nope, I’m not gonna say it. I’m not a pig. Gonna leave it alone. Be a big man Steve, be a big man.

Anyway, this was the FIRST RIDE EVER that I went up Ramsey Hill TWICE. I did a solid 30 miles, and this was the elevation chart of my ride:

A: before climbing Ramsey Hill, my average was 20.8
B: after the hill, it was 19.5
C: before hitting Ramsey Hill for a second time, my average was 19.8
D: after the hill, it was 19.1

I finished the next few miles holding onto that 19.1 average.

I passed a woman going up Ramsey Hill the first time. She passed me on the road about a mile later. That was the first time this year that I was passed on a training ride. But I had just passed her so it doesn’t count, right?


At home, I took off my jersey, sat down all sweaty and hot, and Kermit hopped into my lap and started licking some sweat off my chest:

Then I enjoyed a Monkey Shake from 10:10 Wellness - I used 6-8 frozen strawberries, a (non-frozen) banana, and the rest of the fresh-squeezed OJ from my grandparents who just got back from AZ. Sorry for the out-of-focus shot - I was apparently too excited to drink this:

Back with some photos of me in some new digs tomorrow! I can’t wait to share!


Gear West Duathlon Race Report

>> Monday, May 18, 2009

Yesterday morning, Pharmie, her brother Matt, and I headed out to Orono MN for the Gear West Duathlon. Matt and I were teaming up as “Team Happy Pants” again. Last year, we took second at this race (out of 16), and this year, we were hoping to better that!

We got set up in the “teams” area of transition. We were the first team there:

It was a chilly 40-45 degree morning, so I had been wearing my Under Armour shorts under my “bowl full of sunshine” short yellow shorts. But there was no wind, so I thought I’d be warm enough in just the bowl full of sunshine. So I went into a porta-potty and changed out of the Under Armour. Pharmie was horrified when I came walking towards her with Under Armour in hand (because she knew I’d be running with a LOT of exposed leg!):

I spotted swimming buddy Julia in transition. We chatted for a moment:

Side note: remember Julia? We’ve done a few swim workouts together. Remember this workout from February where Julia pushed me so hard that I died?

Well, it was time to head to the start. Matt, Pharmie, and I walked up the street to the start. Just before the start, I ran into blogger Benson. He was volunteering out on the bike course (so I wouldn’t get to see him during my 2 runs). Pharmie snapped one last photo of Matt and I before I stripped down:

I started in the second wave. The first wave was the “competitive” wave. Pharmie got a photo of Cathy Y as she headed out:

(Don’t forget Cathy: I’ll show her finishing in a moment, and it’s EPIC!)


A few minutes after the competitive wave went out, wave 2 was ready to start. I ran out near the front:

(Note the guy with the shaved head behind me and the guy in the red tank-top beside me. Both of them were RUNNERS.)

Leading out wave 2

The Gear West run course is NASTY! It was in a little better shape than it was last year because we got a little rain the night before the race last year. The course starts out on a road for the first 1K, but then the last 4K are all off-road. Here’s the loopy, nasty course map:

I settled into 2nd in our wave, and after the first 1K, I was back in 3rd. (I was behind those 2 guys that I pointed out in the starting photo.) “Damn. There are some runners here! I hope Matt can catch their bikers!” I ran a few seconds behind them, but they kept pulling away. I was hoping that I wasn’t going TOO fast - I know the 2 guys in front of me were pushing me, and I didn’t know if I was going too hard. I wanted to make sure I had gas in the tank for the second run.

I hit transition about 40 seconds behind 1st place, and just 10 seconds behind 2nd.


I ran through transition and up to Matt. I grabbed his bike (I actually nearly collapsed on it) as he bent down to transfer the chip to his ankle:

The first and second runners are the 2 in the background

Matt had the chip, and he was off:

28K Bike (17.4 miles):

Matt was off and riding. I was SPENT:

Pharmie grabbed a shot of my sweaty boobs, proving that it’s still easy to work up a good sweat in under 20 minutes when it’s only 40-45 degrees:

I briefly talked with the other runners:

I found out that one of them has ran a few sub-3 hour marathons, and that was with having to stop and walk 6 times in one of them. “Jeez, he’s a runner...” And Matt learned that one of their bikers was a Cat-1 or Cat-2 racer. That’s a hell-a-va team.

I walked out of transition were I spotted Kate Weaver. I did that awkward thing that all of us bloggers have done before: “Uhh, Katie? Hi, it’s Steve in a Speedo.” I didn’t know if it was her. But it was, and she threw her arms out and gave me a big “hello” hug! Pharmie came over, and we all talked while Matt was out there working on the bike.

I quickly hit the porta-potty, and got ready for Matt to come back in. One of the teams came in about 2 minutes before Matt. “Dang. I don’t think we can win if I need to chase down THAT runner.” I spotted Matt a few minutes later, and ran back to the “team transition area" and quickly stripped my pants.


Here comes Matt:

He dismounted and came running into transition:

Am I pulling my shorts UP?! Did I think I needed
to show MORE leg?! What the hell?!

I transferred the chip to my ankle, and I was off to see if I could catch their speedy-pants runner:


The second run was shorter because we got to skip the “easy” run on the road. Now it was just the off-road 4K. My legs were BURNING!! I nearly lost my footing once or twice and nearly biffed it.

No beating around the bush: there was no way I could catch the first place team. Just like last year, Matt and I easily had 2nd place, with no shot at first place. The coolest part of that second run was that I got to watch the battle for the first place female unfold. Cathy Y started the run about 20 seconds ahead of Marlo (both are local rockstars). And the 2 of them were only about 30 seconds ahead of me. I was slowly gaining on them. I saw Marlo closing the gap on Cathy. Once we went into and back out of the trees, I saw that Marlo had passed Cathy. And I was rooting for Cathy just because I know her better, so I was bummed. With about 1K left, I was right on Cathy’s tail. We were looping through the trees, and I didn’t want to pass her and accidentally cut her off. So I held back and waited for an opening to pass her. We rounded a corner wide, and she motioned to have me pass. I muttered “Go Cathy - go get Marlo!” as I passed her. A few seconds later I passed Marlo. “Nice job Marlo!”

I hit the final bastard of a hill, and sprinted it to the finish.

It wouldn’t be a race report if there weren’t a one-legged pirate photo of me:

Yo-ho-ho and a bottle of rum Gatorade.

Team Happy Pants: Steve Stenzel, Matt Linder
2 out of 8 teams overall
2 out of 5 M/M teams

5K Run: 18:42 (3rd fastest)
T1: 0:39 (3rd fastest)
28K Bike: 45:45, 22.3 mph (3rd fastest)
T2: 0:32 (tied for 3rd fastest)
4K Run: 17:05 (3rd fastest)

Total: 1:22:41

We did ALL that we could. Both of my runs were faster than last year, our transitions were a LITTLE faster overall, and Matt’s bike was MUCH faster than last year. We did over 3 minutes better than last year, which would have been a team course record, but that one speedy team beat us. We were both happy with our performance, and we were fine coming in second to that team.

So, as I mentioned during that last 4K run, I had just passed Marlo and Cathy, the lead females. Just a few seconds after I finished, there was a SUPER DRAMATIC finish between those 2!! Cathy came from behind and eeked out a win by literally 1/100th of a second!! If she had hit the finish line with her non-chip ankle first, she wouldn’t have won. Check out these photos from Cathy’s blog:

LOOK AT THOSE STRIDES! AND THE MUSCLES IN THOSE LEGS!! Holy crap! (I was just left of the frame just out of the finisher chute, and that’s Matt’s and Pharmie’s back standing at the line.)

After finishing, we spotted Totters (who was volunteering at the finish), and we all chatted for a bit. Her hubby Steve was racing too, and we got to see him finish. It was great to meet you 2 guys!! Matt and I worked our way back through transition, and headed for the grills. They were making Ballpark hot dogs!

Then we ran into Ms. R who had just done the race (and was working on a hotdog), and we chatted for a bit. We also stopped to say hi to Mr. Fury (her hubby). It was great meeting you guys, too!! We also talked a lot with Carlos, who we had met at 2 end-of-season duathlons last year. (It was so great that we got to meet and talk with SO many people!)

We stuck around for the awards. Here’s 4 out of 5 of the top females, and Cathy is talking about the race with Marlo:

I heard Julia’s name read out as one of the AG placers, so I went over to congratulate her. She handed her camera to a friend, and she snapped a photo of us:

Then we went home to make HOMEMADE PASTA!! Here are some homemade sauces in the works:

Here’s Pharmie with some pasta dough that had been rolled out a few times, needing a few more passes:

Then Steph (my sister-in-law) and I ran the pasta dough through the blades in the pasta roller to make noodles.

What a great post-race meal!!

I’ll be back with official photos as soon as they come in. Now, time to hit the bike a few times this week to get ready for the Apple Duathlon this weekend! Have a good week everyone!



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