Friday Funny 28: One of the FEW Ways I Embarrass

>> Friday, March 20, 2009

I don’t embarrass very easily. If you’ve met me, I bet you knew that. If you haven’t met me, reading a bit of my blog should tell you that too. But there is one consistent way that I get embarrassed.

I have 25 pairs of boxers that I regularly wear.

That’s not the embarrassing part.

The embarrassing part is I suddenly become hyper-aware of what boxers I’m wearing when I’m changing next to a bunch of men at the Y. I don’t want guys my age to think I’m a weirdo. And I don’t want old guys thinking I’m some kind of freak.

The vast majority of my boxers tend to call out: “WEIRDO!” I got out all of my underwear last night. Here’s what I’ve got:

Here’s my “cartoon collection.” Spongebob, Stewie, Tom and Jerry (Tom's on the ass), and Woody:

Here are my 2 Simpson’s boxers:

Here are my “gamer” boxers. Yes, I have TWO Nintendo boxers, and 1 pair of Pac-Man:

Random 4. Pigs, “Property of City Hospital,” Dr. Seuss, and rubber duckies:

Another random 4. Playing cards, TVs, monkeys (with bananas), and smiley faces:

Why in the world do I have camouflaged boxers?!?!? When will these come in handy?!?

My folks got these in Mexico for me. They are REAL comfortable, but I have no idea what it says on the leg. Can someone translate for me?

I have 2 “cereal” boxers. Fruit Loops and Raisin Bran Crunch (the Raisin Bran ones say “Breakfast is Back” across the ass):

I even have 2 pairs for minor holidays (which I wear year-round). Here are my Valentines boxers and my Halloween boxers:

Finally, near the bottom, I FOUND MY 2 PAIRS OF “REGULAR” BOXERS!!

So sometime, if we ever meet, you can ask what boxers I’m wearing. I’ll gladly show you. Right now (with my current underwear selection), there’s a 92% chance that it will be something fun. That’s also a 92% chance that I’ll be freaking out the old guys in the locker room at the Y.

(Remember, voting closes tomorrow in the "Tales of a Virgin Athlete" Contest. Click here to read the entries. Then cast your vote before 10 pm Central time tomorrow night!)


Melanie 7:18 AM, March 20, 2009  

LOL, that's hysterical. I can just imagine the looks you've been getting at the Y.

Polz├║nkov 7:38 AM, March 20, 2009  

Your Mexican boxers say something like:
"Quality gift...
that is why I bought you a quality packaging"



Polz├║nkov 7:38 AM, March 20, 2009  

BTW... your Stewie´s boxers rule!

Steve Stenzel 8:13 AM, March 20, 2009  

Thanks for the translation, Polzunkov! So my parents got me boxers that talk about my "quality package?" That's great!! HA!

Gotta Run 8:21 AM, March 20, 2009  

I never know what I will get when I pull up your!!

Runner Leana 8:37 AM, March 20, 2009  

The Fruit Loops ones are my favourite! I could only translate half of your Mexican boxers, so I'm glad Gabriel provided the entire translation. That is insteresting then that they came from your parents!

Marni 8:38 AM, March 20, 2009  

Not sure how I can tell my husband that I saw all of your boxers this morning :)
You are silly!

Michelle 8:52 AM, March 20, 2009  

Ok Steve I officially LOVE you!!! Like i really do!!

If I could find a guy who wears boxers such as the one's above I would be a happy lady!!!


Seriously very adorable!!!

CoachLiz 8:54 AM, March 20, 2009  

Hey! Go over to Target and pick up the yellow boxers with bicycles all over them!

Love the Jerry the Mouse ones and the Fruit Loops ones.

trimybest 8:57 AM, March 20, 2009  

i suppose funny looks in your boxers is better than getting funny looks when youre naked! haha

X-Country2 8:59 AM, March 20, 2009  

Do you really own Joe Boxer undies. Dang man, how old are THOSE?!

raulgonemobile 9:00 AM, March 20, 2009  

Oh, I'm so glad I'm not the only one with fun boxers.

I have Andy Capp Hot Fries boxers, even..

J-Wim 9:05 AM, March 20, 2009  

My son owns several of the same pairs, which I know from folding them every week.

Blyfinn 9:18 AM, March 20, 2009  

HA I have the same issue. I always get looks at the Y when I'm wearing my Family Guy boxers.

sRod 9:24 AM, March 20, 2009  

Ah the underwear issue.

Fortunately I live a 5-minute walk from my gym, so I don't have to worry about this!

Marlene 9:49 AM, March 20, 2009  

I have to say, this is the only blog spot I have ever read that includes photos of underwear!

Calyx Meredith 9:59 AM, March 20, 2009  

Love the ones your parents got you! My SIL inadvertently did something like that. She bought her teenage son boxers that said "Center of the Universe" on them because they had a running joke about him being conceited - but she didn't see the arrow pointing to the crotch when they were folded in the package. Eeek! Have fun freaking out the old guys at the Y!

lindsay 10:44 AM, March 20, 2009  

my life is complete now that i have seen your underwear collection. i was a little disappointed to see that none of them were lacy little numbers though.

Carlee 10:55 AM, March 20, 2009  

So funny; thanks for sharing. It takes a real man...

Chad 12:05 PM, March 20, 2009  

Those camouflaged boxers blend right in with the quilt they're laying on. See, they work.

Judi 12:20 PM, March 20, 2009  

dominic wears spiderman and batman boxers. and why change in front of people? i ALWAYS use the dressing room. i wish all the women would too. lol.

have a great weekend.

p.s. looks like i lost. boo. o-well. i was happy to come in the top 10 anyways. thanks steve.

RunToFinish 12:43 PM, March 20, 2009  

that is committment to a good post... continuous pictures. I don't think I'll be sharing my undies any time soon

aron 1:22 PM, March 20, 2009  

LOL that is hilarious... you have quite the collection :)

tfh 1:55 PM, March 20, 2009  

You are so weird.

In a good way. :)

I'm sure that's what the other men in the locker room are thinking!

Eileen Swanson 2:28 PM, March 20, 2009  

HILARIOUS! But fun for sure.....

AKA Alice 2:31 PM, March 20, 2009  

So...are you trying to start the trend where we all post photos of our underwear?

Clever..very clever...

Ali 2:38 PM, March 20, 2009  

I love this! You are hilarious. I like the Spongebob pair.

Thanks for sharing

I Run for Fun 5:06 PM, March 20, 2009  

LOL! I can't believe you lined up all your underwear, clicked and posted pics of them!

Are we voting on the best underwear? I've got to go for the Fruit Loops one.

joyRuN 5:09 PM, March 20, 2009  


This is a whole new level of intimacy I wasn't ready for :)

Carly 5:51 PM, March 20, 2009  

LMAO, I can only imagine the looks at the Y from the other guys.

chia 5:51 PM, March 20, 2009  

Wow that's the most action I've gotten since I unpacked and found a pair of my MI-man's boxer briefs in Gizmo's cat box.

Hoolia,  5:57 PM, March 20, 2009  

Those are awesome! The heck with the guys at the Y - they could probably use a dose of irreverence anyways. The full translation of your boxers appears to be "For your birthday I'm going to give you a really quality gift, and that's why I bought you a quality package." Interesting... =)

Adam 6:09 PM, March 20, 2009  

oh, I think that we've all went through this phase. You're just a late bloomer - that is all.

So, what is worse, the guys being weirded out by your boxers or you being weirded out by their floppy wangles? Maybe next time if you see them looking at you, you should say "dude, I got a pair in my truck for you too!"

The Happy Runner 6:37 PM, March 20, 2009  

I think you need to find reasons to wear the camo boxers. At least once a week!

tnl634 9:11 PM, March 20, 2009  

Hi! Just doscovered your blog..pretty funny...
I think I'm going to start buying my hubby stuff like!!

Here's my interpretation:

Left side:
Quality Gift
That is why I bought you,
a gift with quality.

Roght side:
For Your Birthday
I'm going to give you pure Chilis...Spice....Jalepenos?...

Sixteen Chickens 9:14 PM, March 20, 2009  

Your boxer collection looks suspiciously like my 16 year old sons boxer collection.

Sarah 11:28 AM, March 21, 2009  

I had no idea that men even wore that style (baggy boxer) anymore! That's the real issue!

Nat 11:38 AM, March 21, 2009  

I love the pacman and pumpkin ones.

21stCenturyMom 2:10 PM, March 21, 2009  

You know what this really makes you, right? It makes you really easy to shop for.

econutjob 10:23 AM, March 22, 2009  

haha! I actually own the spongebob boxers (and different pair not pictured), Horton (of Dr. Suess) boxers, Ants boxers, and Super Mario Bro boxer briefs. Oh and Spongebob pajamas.


Trish 11:44 AM, March 22, 2009  

HA! You've got a great collection there! LOL! :-)

Benson 10:18 AM, March 25, 2009  

What? Those are all cotton.
Where's the silk ones?

Eric 2:46 PM, April 02, 2009  

I have that exact same pair of Sponge Bob boxers :-)

I worry more at the gym that the guy standing next to me is noticing just how smooth my legs are LOL!!!

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