Friday Funny 1241: Puns

THIS HAS BEEN MY FAVORITE JOKE OF THE LAST 2 MONTHS.

More funny things posted all week long atsteveinaspeedo.tumblr.com.

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Semi-Wordless Wednesday: An Anniversary of an Important Event

A few days ago, this appeared in a "Facebook memory" from 2 years ago:

That was all leading up to the YWCA Indoor Triathlon in March of 2015. That was a fun race.

And today, Devon posted this, and there was a short conversation:

Devon's comment about this being the "moment that started it all" with regards to the awkward prom photo is in reference to when Devon and I posed later that spring after the 2015 Cinco DU Mayo Duathlon:

ALL OF THIS REMINDS ME THAT LISA STILL OWES ME 2 HOURS OF CHILDCARE BECAUSE I BEAT HER AT THAT TRIATHLON. Let me get on that. My wife and I need a date...

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February 2017 = GREAT Month to Bike Outside in Minnesota!

I started February resting because of some knee pain, but then Dr. Folske told me (on Friday the 10th) that I needed to get back to normal training to help my leg/knee, so that's what I did. The last few weeks of February looked GOOD. The 12th through the 28th had a swim, bike, or run each day!

I looked back in my training log since I've kept one online (which has been 90 months [late summer of 2009]), and in those 90 months, I've only had 12 months with more bike milage. And all of those were SUMMER months! (Except for 1 big November right after getting my new bike 15 months ago.) Awesome February!

To highlight some of the rides, here are some links:

• Long icy ride.
• Long tempo ride.
• A week of rides leading up to a snow storm that didn't exist.
• Earning the top spot in a segment on GarminConnect.
• Some sweet hill repeats here in St. Paul.

Alright, those running and swimming totals are weak, so time to work on those. (Knock on wood, but my knee SEEMS to be doing OK after an easier weekend.) Happy training!

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Biking St. Paul's Hills! (x6)

Tuesday between classes, I got out for a hilly ride. I rode up Ohio Hill 3 times, and then rode up Ramsey Hill 3 times. This was my first true hill workout in nearly 2 years.

6 hill repeats (3 Ohio and 3 Ramsey), but STOPPING my watch accidentally
to start each of the 3, so this only shows 4 repeats (and 2 sudden jumps in
elevation as I restarted my Garmin at the top, noted with the exclamation points).


Speed and elevation combined. The big spike in speed in the middle
between the 2 sets of 3 is biking down the Smith Street High Bridge.

Being this is the first time doing all these hills on my new bike (Eiffel), I wanted to look back on this same workout from a few years ago when I was doing it on my old bike (Goldilocks). Here are my splits up these hills the last 3 times I did a workout like this: 3 years ago, 2 years ago, and this week (each as a different column):

Dates: 5/2014, 5/2015, 2/2017

Ohio #1: 2:25, 2:14, 2:16
Ohio #2: 2:26, 2:19, 2:18
Ohio #3: 2:29, 2:19, 2:18

Average: 2:27, 2:17, 2:17


Ramsey #1: 1:37, 1:25, 1:21
Ramsey #2: 1:35, 1:28, 1:23
Ramsey #3: 1:35, (xxx), 1:21 (only did Ramsey 2x in 2015)

Average: 1:36, 1:27, 1:22

So the new bike was as fast as I was 2 years ago on Ohio, but then was a fair amount faster on the final 3 hills on Ramsey. AND THIS WAS A FEBRUARY RIDE! I need to keep this up to be in GREAT shape for duathlon and triathlon season!

Here's a photo of bro-in-law Matt warming up before riding this workout with me in 2014:

Trailing big sexy down Big River's Trail.

Here's a bit from 3 years ago as I finished up that workout with Matt as seen in this post:

Here are some photos Matt got of me on my final hill climb:

That speck in front of that car is me - I'm about 2/3 up the hill.


Almost up.


Close up of the elevation of the 6 hill repeats. Some nasty climbs over 25 mins.
Close to 2,000 feet of climbing over 6 miles!

The bad news is that after my short run the next day (Wednesday), my knee started hurting again. I took Thursday off, swam a bit on Friday (which didn't seem to hurt it), and I may try hopping on the trainer for just an easy 20-30 min spin this afternoon before running tomorrow. Hopefully I just angered it a bit by stressing it on the hills, and after a few days of rest, it'll be good again. HOPEFULLY!

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Friday Funny 1240: Dangerous Acts of Stupidity

Acid Cow share some "dangerous acts of stupidity," and here are 17 good/bad ones:

It hurts just looking at this...


























I mean, he's strapped in, so there's nothing to worry about, right?...

Lots more funny things posted all day long on steveinaspeedo.tumblr.com.

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Friday Funny 1239: Reasons NOT to Date a Runner

Running Magazine recently shared a list of 16 reasons not to date runners. It's kinda funny:

1. We will wear our sweaty gear out to dinner once we get comfortable.
At first we plan our outfits. Or we throw on some socially acceptable combination of clothing before going to meet you. Over time, that will fade. We will routinely show up in sweaty workout gear and you will get mad we can’t go to nice places.

2. Running causes tons of aches and pains. We will ask for massages.
Especially the feet and calves. By dating a runner, you basically become a massage therapist.

3. Our homes smell like shoes.
Because there are so many of them. Yes we clean. We might even move the shoes into another room. No matter what we do, our homes always smell vaguely shoe-y.

4. We are in the habit of extending our runs when we're out. This means we will often be late.
Get used to the sheepish look on your runner lover's face when he/she comes in the door. You heard 5K run. That was the intention but somehow it ended up being 11K instead. Sorry.

5. Saturday night dates aren't a thing.
Unless your idea of a hot date consists of an early night, bland food and no alcohol. Hey, we gotta be up early on Sunday.

6. Every so often you will get an emergency call asking you to drive out to pick us up from a run gone wrong.
Your girlfriend/boyfriend/spouse sprained an ankle, got lost, had a stomach issue, etc. You’ll hear every excuse in the book. It doesn’t mean you’ll ever enjoy stopping what you’re doing, getting in the car and finding your significant other in the middle of nowhere to drive them home.

7. Our blisters and chafing might be somewhat unappealing.
This might be an understatement. And if you’re dating a man, add bloody nipples to that.

8. Don’t like the taste of sweat? Too bad.
You’re going to taste our sweat. You will know exactly what it tastes like. Another gross part about loving a runner.

9. We will drag you out for a run with us even if you hate it.
Somehow we convince you, you hate it. We stay hopeful that one day you will join us at the start line of a race.

10. Then we’ll do it again.
Because we ignore your complaints.

11. If you want company in the morning, your best bet is a teddy bear or dog. Count us out.
We are out running before anyone wakes up. The up side is that you might wake up with breakfast and coffee ready.

12. Our toenails are disgusting.
Hopefully you’re not squeamish. Hopefully you like the colour black.

13. You are going to hear so much runner talk that will bore you out of your mind.
Club gossip, race times, the new running route, the new racing fad, which pair of shoes we tried today, the list goes on. Thanks for at least faking your excitement.

14. There is no room for your shoes on the rack.
And yes we need all of those running shoes.

15. There will be laundry everywhere.
We wash it and then out of nowhere, the hamper fills up all over again.

16. We eat your food.
We do this almost as shamelessly as dogs do. Because we’re running, we are always hungry. When we come home from a long run, we feel half-starved and end up eating everything in site.

More funny things posted on steveinaspeedo.tumblr.com.

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Friday Funny 1238: Food That Lies

Dear food: I love you so. Why must you lie to me?

More funny things posted all day long on steveinaspeedo.tumblr.com.

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Thirsty (for knowledge) Thursday: How Being a Masters Athlete Can Affect Your Lifespan

People have been sharing this article about "Lifespan vs 'Health'-span." It doesn't seem super scientific, but it still seems a step or 2 better than an "fake news."

Here are some parts I want to highlight:

Different parts of our body and brain mature at different rates, so it’s very difficult to say what human ‘peak age’ might be. However, it’s clear that the first phase of life is dominated by growth, while declines become more apparent in the second half.

Many of us assume that the ageing process is a fixed process, that we reach our peak then begin an irreversible decline. This hasn’t stopped an entire industry from trying to make an impact, though.

It seems that many of us would prefer to ‘die young as late as possible’, but while we’re living longer, we’re living ‘sicker’.

Here's why they started looking at athletes for this study:

Sport as a laboratory

Studying ageing is a challenge, because as we get older, the number of confounding factors in observational research increases. The longer we live, the more choices we make, the wider variety of environments, stimuli and stresses we are exposed to. This can distort results, making it difficult to discern the difference between natural declines in health and performance from deteriorations that occur as a result of lifestyle factors and poor choices.

In contrast, the world of sport represents a fascinating ‘laboratory’ for studying human potential in the absence of sedentary behaviour. In athletic competition, cardiovascular, respiratory, neuromuscular as well as cognitive systems must all work well individually, and as a system, making it one of the best testing grounds for how our body and brain should work together at their best.

Physical inactivity is a primary cause of many of the chronic ailments which afflict an ageing population, but the high levels of physical activity among masters athletes mean that they should be free from many of the negative effects of sedentary behaviour. Any declines in athletic performance mirror the changes in the body and mind that occur as we age, rather than being a result of inactivity or other intervening lifestyle factors.

They go on to say...

The performance changes in masters sporting events display a ‘curvilenear,’ rather than linear, pattern. Instead of reaching a peak in their 30s, before experiencing an inexorable and linear decline, masters athletes retain close-to-peak performance for much longer, experiencing a gentler decline, followed by a rapid drop-off in the latter part of life.

The findings among masters athletes reflect the aim that many of us have: maximise ‘healthspan’ by reaching a peak, then maintaining our health, physical and cognitive capacities for as long as we can, compressing ill health into as short a period as possible.

So if you hear people say things like "sure, you work out a lot, but studies show you only gain a few extras years of life," you can quote this study and say "yes, but my plan as an older athlete is to maintain health, physical and cognitive capacities for as long as I can and lose my fitness at a slower rate - my final years will be full of more vigor than yours!" Just look at the difference in "health" of an 80-year-old who's "average" vs a "masters athlete" in that graph above. That's a BIG gap.

For more "Thirsty Thursday" posts that highlight workouts, body science, and all kinds of interesting information, CLICK HERE. Back with some "Friday Funnies" tomorrow.

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Semi-Wordless Wednesday: King of the Hill!

So this happened on my lunch-time ride yesterday:

Fastest segment of the 2200 people who have rode it!

I noted in a post last week that I was 9th during a 20 mile TT ride, and that I knew I could do better. So yesterday, I did better.

Back with a review of a SOLID February in Saturday's post. It had a lot of biking. For February. For me.

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