Friday Funny 546: Book Titles With a Letter Missing

>> Friday, July 05, 2013

The hashtag #BooksWithALetterMissing was recently trending on twitter. Darth decided to take the best titles and make fake covers for those books. So here are 10 "Book Titles with One Letter Missing."





















More funnies on steveinaspeedo.tumblr.com.

Read more...

Friday Funny 545: Strangest Workout Videos

I'm really good at #9. And #4 is my plan for Saturday night.


Direct link: http://youtu.be/jE3KWhUCros

#3 is a little hypnotizing. And I felt bad that they were making fun of people in wheelchairs in the #1 video, but then she jumps out of right field in some sort of judo stance! What?!?

More funnies on steveinaspeedo.tumblr.com!

Read more...

Friday Funny 544: Places to Poop

A reader sent me this.... she knew I'd be interested. Buzzfeed recently posted an article called "14 Places You Have To Poop At Before You Die: A look at the world’s coolest restrooms." Check it out:

1. The One-Way Outhouse:
This is the outside of the bathroom. Seems harmless, right?



But this is the inside of the bathroom, a boxed view of your entire surroundings. This diabolical toilet was created by London artist Monica Bonvicini.




2. The $29 Million Dollar Toilet:
This solid gold toilet was created by the Hang Fu­ng Gold Technology Group and is located in Hong Kong. Plastic shoe covers are required to be worn at all times while in the restroom, so as not to scuff the floor’s 900-gram gold medal bars.




3. The Bottomless Bathroom:
Mexico is home to the world’s scariest bathroom, which happens to be located on the top of a 15-story elevator shaft. You may literally find yourself scared shitless if you visit.




4. The Retractable Toilet:
The Dutch company Urilift has created public restrooms which magically appear after-dark, so as to keep the area more picture-friendly during the day. Each retractable toilet contains multiple urinals that are equipped with lights, allowing for optimal usage when in session.




5. The Urine-Controlled Video Game:
Ever think “man, I’m so bored” while you pee? Me neither. But that hasn’t stopped Japan and the UK from creating urine-controlled video games, which are strategically placed in bars: “Apparently sales of Corona beer increased 47 per cent once the special urinals and wall-mounted displays were installed.” Let’s just hope there’s not a two-player option.




6. The Underwater Bathroom:
This woman’s restroom is encompassed by an underwater aquarium, located in Akashi, Japan. This is one of the most expensive toilets in the world, costing roughly $270,000.




7. The Waterfall Bathroom:
Make your own log flume at The Madonna Inn, a hotel that flushes with a waterfall.




8. The Eco-Friendly Bathroom:
Everything in this Milwaukee restroom is 100% environmentally friendly: “the bathrooms use 100% rainwater to flush its low-flow toilets… Electricity for lights and pumps is solar powered, toilet paper and towels are made from 100% recyclable materials, soaps and cleaners are biodegradable, the paint on the walls is from organic compounds, and the urinals don’t flush.”




9. The Self-Cleaning Restroom:
The Sanisette is a self-cleaning public restroom, first pioneered in Paris. After a patron exits the restroom, “a wash cycle begins inside the toilet, and the toilet fixture itself is scrubbed and disinfected automatically.” The washing process takes 60 seconds.




10. The Vertical Bathroom:
Have a small bathroom? No problem! Poop in style with The Vertebrae, a fully-equipped restroom of the future: “Award-winning designer Paul Hernon improvised The Vertebrae considering the space-conscious householders who struggle to fit a traditional shower, sink and toilet into their bathroom space.”




11. The Egg Toilet:
These Space Age egg-pods can be found in London’s “sketch”, which was ranked the 18th best restaurant in the world in 2005.




12. The Timed Toilet:
WARNING: Use at your own risk. These New York public restrooms are automatically unlocked and opened after 15 minutes. There is also a weight limit for each restroom, so as to prevent small children from getting trapped inside and scandalous activity from potential partygoers or those who are a bit more adventurous. Can you beat the clock?




13. The Ski-Jump Toilet:
Japan’s Madarao-Kogen hotel is home to the simulated ski-jump toilet, offering maximum comfort without the harshness of winter: “The cubicles were fully wrapped on all sides, so that the person caught short would have a ski jumper’s view when they were sitting on the loo.”




14. The Space Bathroom:
This out-of-this-world restroom is fully equipped with leg and arm restraints while in use, to ensure total accuracy. Also, “the toilet uses flowing air instead of water to flush the toilet. The air pulls the waste away from the astronaut’s body and flushes it away.”




And that’s the scoop on where to poop.




Check out more funnies at steveinaspeedo.tumblr.com!

Read more...

Happy Independence Day!

>> Thursday, July 04, 2013




Just a funny little thing I posted on my tumblr 2 days ago. Happy 4th!

Read more...

Some Nasty, Nasty Intervals at the Track

>> Wednesday, July 03, 2013

Coach Jen was going to give me one more interval workout to do this morning - 1 week before my 1 mile road race. (HERE was her first round of intervals for me, and HERE was her second round.) She recently tweeted this:



She sent me a workout that was pretty easy (6x200 descending). I figured it was just because the race was a week away and I had nothing really to gain at this point. Then a few hours later, I get THIS tweet:


Ah hell naw.

Just after that, I tweeted her workout thoughts for me:



Yep, 16x200 done 4x(4x200). First set at 35, next set at 33, next at 31, next at red line. I was to jog 200 between the 200s and walk 3 minutes between the sets of 4. The best part of her workout was when she said "If you go 'macho man' on the first set and do 31s you will not finish the workout correctly. Better to be at 36 on the first set than 31. The idea is to warm up into it and still get the muscles firing quick quick quick by the end."

I got to the track this morning at 4:45 as the sky was just starting to brighten over the St. Thomas campus:



I swear Jen Harrison workouts make me crazy: I talk to myself the most before her workouts. I was walking around on the track getting ready to go while repeating what I needed to do. I did the same thing during her workout 2 weeks ago.

I knew my "jog" times would most likely get slower and slower throughout the workout, but I didn't care - I wasn't going to look at those times. I wasn't going to dawdle between the intervals, but I wasn't going to kill myself trying to only take XX seconds of a break if Jen didn't give me a specific time goal for that.

Here's what I logged:

1.5 WU: 12:50

About 8:00 of stretching / walking

0:37.0 (1:09)
0:36.5 (1:04)
0:35.4 (1:03)
0:34.4 (3:00)

0:32.4 (1:07)
0:34.3 (1:03)
0:33.0 (1:03)
0:32.7 (2:59)

Coach Jen is always able to get me to hit my numbers. I somehow become able to sense my pace REALLY WELL when I work with her. Look at that last set: I knew the first was a little fast as I was about to finish it, so I told myself to ease back to maybe a 34 for the 2nd (which I did). After that one, I thought "OK, now a 33 like I'm supposed to do." Bam - 0:33.0 on the nose. And then I finished with a just slightly fast 32.7. HOW CAN JEN MAKE ME DO THIS?!? I remember a 4x1600 workout she gave me when we worked together 3 years ago where she told me to run the final interval faster than I'd ran any 1600 interval ever before (when I usually just do 3x1600). And I nailed it. This is what a coach can do to you!

OK, back to the workout:

0:32.0 (1:07)
0:32.0 (1:10)
0:32.7 (1:11)
0:32.3 (3:02) - not a single 31 in this set. Dang. But not unexpected.

0:31.8 (1:07) - YES!!! A 31!!
0:32.0 (1:09)
0:31.8 (1:15)
0:32.3

About 4:30 of walking / cussing / trying not to die, then jogged home.

I figured I might not see any 31s in the 3rd set, but I was THRILLED to see 2 show up in the final set! When I started that final set and ran my first 31, I wasn't seeing straight for a while. I was BEAT UP! I really felt like I had to puke as I wrapped up my 2.75 mile cool down. (But I didn't.)

Overall, this workout wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. The first set wasn't horrible. The 2nd started to suck. The 3rd really sucked, and the 4th was just "survival." But it wasn't long and depressing. I've learned that I LOVE workouts broken into chunks like this. If Jen said 16x200, I'd have punched her. But 16x200 done as 4x(4x200) is much more do-able. I MAY do something like this again.

Alright, that's my last hard workout before next Wednesday night's "road mile!" We'll see how it goes!

Read more...

"Friendship Day" 2 Mile Road Race

>> Monday, July 01, 2013

To continue Henry's adventures with Dad this summer, we headed "back home" on Friday afternoon. We stayed at my parents house on Friday night, and then spent the morning racing with my wife's family on Saturday. (My parents and my in-laws live about 5 miles apart in southern MN.)


Henry playing in one of my Dad's combine tires.


Running through my Dad's (WINDY) soybean field just before bedtime.


"The gang" pre-race on Saturday morning: my wife's cousins, siblings, spouses of cousins,
girlfriends / husbands of siblings, and my mother-in-law to the far right.

I was aware I could place well at this race, and I honestly hoped there'd be some speedy high school cross-country boys there to help pull me. But I knew I COULD be running in the lead. So I asked Dale what the course was.



Dale: "Turn up there before the bank..."

Me: "I don't know where the bank is."

Dale: "... then loop around and come back out around [blank] store..."

Me: "I don't know where [blank] store is."

Dale: "Turn at 'The Club'..."

Me: "OK, THAT I know." (My "groom's supper" was at The Club about 9 years and 11 months ago!)

Dale: "... then go a few blocks to that other road. You know that road. It's Co Rd Something-Or-Another."

Me: "Nope, don't know that."

Dale: "... then turn onto Linder street for a few blocks, and turn around." (This is what he's pointing to in the photo above as I clear my Garmin.)

Me: "I know Linder Street. Gotcha. Turn a bunch, then turn around on Linder Street. No prob."

The race director assured us there'd be people directing us at every turn, so I was just hoping for that if I was in the lead. She gave us a count-down, and we were off!!


The priest from this town is the 5th from the right in the white! He finished in the top 20!

I shot into the lead right away, with a cross-country runner on my tail (the one in blue next to me in the photo above). I turned to ask him "do you know the course?" He said "No... You?" "Nope!" I said with a smile!

We ran up a little hill about 2 blocks into the race, and I knew I was working - I was already breathing very hard. A women walked out into the middle of the street ahead of me and pointed left. "OK, left it is." We looped around a block, and then I saw a man getting out of a pickup. It was a high school buddy of my Dad's. He pointed to the left. "Thanks Ron!" I yelled and waved. After another block, another person stepped out of a pickup truck to point me to the right. I LOVED THIS SMALL TOWN RACE! There was just always someone in a large pickup ready to tell me which way to go!

It was lightly raining off-and-on pre-race, and now the wind kicked up and it started raining again. It was FINE for racing in (although it sucks to have wind in your face when you're trying to run hard), but I was hoping toddler cousins Henry and Evie back at the church wouldn't get soaked while spectating.

After 2 more blocks, SOMEONE ELSE STEPPED OUT OF TRUCK AND POINTED ME TO THE RIGHT. I swear I'm not making this up. There was always someone in a truck. I turned onto the big straight stretch, and I tried to work hard. I could have been working more for this middle mile (from around 0.5 - 1.5), but it was hard to make myself push any harder. In the back of my mind, I just kept thinking that I didn't want to show up to this small race (of about 100-150 maybe) and smoke everyone. I REALLY wished I had a CC runner in front of me. I was still working, but I could have pushed myself a bit more.

At an intersection about 3 blocks from the turn-around, THERE WAS ANOTHER TRUCK WITH ANOTHER MAN DIRECTING US RUNNERS. This was one of the race director's brothers. So many trucks. So fun.

At the turn-around I saw that 1 CC runner was within a half block of me, and a few more were single-file just behind him. At that point, I figured I had the race won - most CC runners go out hard and start to "die" before the finish. But now I needed to keep the race strong as a good test for my 1 mile road race coming up next Wednesday.


Behind the pole - just after the turn-around. I ran around the guy in the
red shirt (peeking out behind the right side of the tree) as the turn-around.

I cheered on the other runners, and I high-fived some of my family. I hit my watch a little late at the turn-around, and I saw the time read 4:58. Yep, this is going to be a little short. The "long stretch" was now into the gusty wind as some rain fell. It wasn't fun.

Post-race, Jon told me that when he saw the leader coming back at him, he didn't know it was me. He thought it was a CC runner with really fast feet. I was happy to hear that because I'd been working on my turn-over in the last 2 years since my last bad injury - I used to have the tendency to over-stride, but by having quicker foot-strikes, there's less of a chance to over-stride. I've gotten my foot-strikes from around 160/min to around 180/min.

I made all those turns again and booked it to the finish. Henry came running out for a hug when I was 50 feet from the finish line!!



It was adorable, but I had to brush him off and finish first. He chased after me to the finishline:




Close up of that last photo.

He gave me a big hug once I finished and turned-around to see him. It was a lot like when Henry went running out to Pharmie at the MPLS Marathon about a month ago:


Just after the marathon hug around mile 15!

Henry kept telling me "I spit... spit water..." and he kept bending over to spit in the grass:



... then I realized he was mimicking me and the first few CC boys behind me who all bent down and spit a little after finishing! This guy picks up on EVERYTHING!! Ha!

So I finished 1st out of 100 or 150 runners, and I was about 30 seconds ahead of second place. They officially had me at 9:40, but that was only 1.83 miles (as my Garmin and Jon's Garmin both read).

RESULTS:

"Friendship Day 2 Mile"
1st out of 100+
9:40 (4:50 pace)

Garmin read 1.83 which was on 10:38 pace for 2 full miles
First lap split on Garmin: 5:20 pace
Second lap split on Garmin: 5:18 pace


Here's my Gamin map of the race. Notice we hit or crossed nearly every street in this town of 199 people:



When I zoomed out another 2 steps, you can see the town in the middle of wide-open southern MN:


A number of relatives' farms are dotted throughout this image.

Here are a couple more family photos from the finishline:


Jon with his wife Steph back among the boys up the hill. Jon's wearing his Grandma's Marathon
shirt from THE PREVIOUS WEEKEND! Running a marathon and then a 2 mile is quite a leap!


Henry's cousin Evie ran the final feet of the race after Steph and Jon finished!
And there's the church where Pharmie and I were married nearly 10 years ago!!


Annie, Brianna, and Mike.

Annie (pink) and Mike (blue) are my brother and sister-in-law, and Brianna (green) is Mike's lady. We're all so proud of Annie - she's lost a lot of weight since spring, and she's hoping we get into the TC 10 Mile so she can run that!! Her and Brianna just had to walk for a block during this 2-miler! NICE WORK YOU 2!! (And way to beat Mike. Ha!)

Afterwards, Henry and Evie ran around and played games with Grandma!


Evie and Henry trying to figure out hole #4.


Picking out prizes.


Henry and I about to go on a hayride around town! Check out his sweet smiley face tat.
(And there's Grandma behind me with Evie!)


Henry driving Uncle Mike's tractor. Where is it safe for a 2-year-old to pull a
hayrack full of kids through town with an antique tractor? Easton, MN, that's where!!


Henry's not good at mini golf.


Aunt Annie = Toddler Wrangler.

So now I have a few quick, short workouts left, and then I'm doing a 1 mile road race in 9 days! I have to start HARD and run stronger than I did at this race. I have to suffer a lot and finish as far under 5:00 as possible! I'll post some of Coach Jen's final workouts in the next few days.

Read more...

Twitter

Follow steveinaspeedo on Twitter

Facebook Fan Page

All content and original images copyright 2006 - 2026 by Steve Stenzel, AKA "Steve in a Speedo." All Rights Reserved.
Want to use something seen here? Just ask - I don't bite.