A Couple Of Lists...

>> Tuesday, June 19, 2007

Top Five Signs I’m A IM Wanna-be / Blogger

• When spell check gives the “correct” suggestion for Trisaratops, it looks absolutely foreign to me.

• I’m already deciding where to put my tattoo. You know, THE TATTOO.

• In conversation I’ve been referring to my wife as Pharmie, her blogger name.

• When I’m out on a workout, I’m secretly hoping for something strange, dramatic, or crazy to happen so I’ll have something to write about.

• Suddenly, I’ve been thinking that I’m WAY too hairy.

Top Reasons I SHOULDN’T Become IM

• I’ve never had a flat on any of my bikes. Not one.

• I miss recreational bike rides.

• My tri bike only cost $800. And that included the aero bars and all.

• I’m not into gadgets. I don’t have a heart rate monitor, a power meter, or anything else fancy like that. My bike computer doesn’t show cadence. And it’s not wireless. Well, I guess it’s not that I don’t like gadgets - it’s just that I’m cheap.

• I still giggle when anyone brings up “Body Glide.” I mean, it’s lube in deodorant form - how crazy! “Stay dry and confidant while you become slippery and greasy ALL OVER!”

• I learned how to swim from a DVD. And I’m not even doing it right.

• My nutrition is crap. Right before my last 2 mile swim, I had nachos with cheese, a piece of sting cheese, and a boat-load of cottage cheese. Apparently I have a thing for processed dairy. It showed up again right after the swim.

• I still refer to my swims as “2 miles” instead of “3200 meters” as I should be. I know there are many swimmers/triathletes out there that hate this. Deal with it.

• I’m WAY too hairy


Lance Notstrong 5:45 PM, June 19, 2007  

You don't at least shave your legs? I think I've been cycling too long. Non-shaved legs look funny to me now.

Steve Stenzel 5:49 PM, June 19, 2007  

Nothing is shaved. Yet. Give me a month or 2 and that will change.

Tracy 7:55 PM, June 19, 2007  

See, now all I can think about is that picture of you with cat saliva swirling your chest hair in a disturbing little perma-pattern. Gehhhh!

Anonymous,  7:55 PM, June 19, 2007  

Have you tried the Peach Nair cream? It takes it right off and leaves your skin silky smooth.. Tiffany

Gordon 8:55 PM, June 19, 2007  

Lol. Oh man, ditto on the "I'm too hairy" thing. How does that happen? I was totally comfortable with how I looked until this year.

Also ditto on the "waiting for something crazy" thing. I sit on my bike and when I'm not thinking about perfecting my spin, I find myself thinking about what has happened that might be noteworthy.

And Body Glide is always funny, no matter what. Same with utter cream. hehe.

RunBubbaRun 10:50 PM, June 19, 2007  

So does that mean you are shaving?

You know they can make wigs off that..

I'm glad I'm not the only one who learned how to swim thru a DVD.

And actually most people don't understand "meters" anyways. Miles sounds much more COOL..

Unknown 5:09 AM, June 20, 2007  

Yards can be converted to miles too. That way we're all on the same page!

Go for wax or Nair. Nothing worse than the icky bumps guys always seem to get when shaving.

RobbyB 9:20 AM, June 20, 2007  

* Just shave, silly. The ladies will love it!

* Knock on wood, I never got a flat until 8 months after my IM.

* If you're bike has two wheels and some pedals, you're good to go.

* And yes, as a swimmer, you should learn yards/meters. But "2 miles" is better than "128 lengths"

Lance Notstrong 9:21 AM, June 20, 2007  

I agree with Mallie about the waxing. Wax the chest, shave the legs and consult with Pharmie about the other "regions" LOL!!!

qcmier 1:08 PM, June 20, 2007  

What's better than "Body Glide" "Chamois Butt'r!!!"

Dude be a real man, stay natural, don't shave. As James Bond said, "bird never makes nest in bare tree."

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