Or, “Total Domination by ‘Team Happy Pants’”
(Race Format: 1.75 mile run, 14 mile bike, 3 mile run.)
Day Before:
I had a great pre-race meal at Snuffys Malt Shop with Mike and Pharmie (the same place we went the night before the LTF Tri). I had a chicken sandwich, a bunch of fries, and part of a strawberry shake:
Those fries gave Pharmie and I HORRIBLE GAS all night!
Pre-Race:
Got up, ate breakfast, had a good race-morning poo, and was ready to go. It’s easy to pack for a duathlon that you’re doing as a team:
1. Running shoes
2. Race Belt
3. Nipguards
(If you don’t know why I need Nipguards, scroll down a couple of posts.) So, we picked up Matt and his bike, and headed south to Faribault. It was a dreary, wet, foggy day:
Team Happy Pants!
A few minutes before we started, there was a meeting in transition. Take a look at how FEW bikes there are, and how MUCH space each one has! There was an average of literally 3 bikes per rack!
Then we headed down to the starting line, which was about 200 meters away. Oh yeah, I had changed into the “Bowl Full of Sunshine:”
Sorry for my paleness...
Mark, the race director, stood off to the side and shouted GO. We were off:
Leading the pack on the left
I was afraid that I was going too fast; I didn’t know if I’d be fresh enough for the 3 mile run later on. But I didn’t let up. I just booked it home.
Meanwhile, as I was wrapping up the run, Matt was in transition with the other 3 teams’ bikers. They were in the "team transition zone," waiting for their runners to come running in:
Matt’s in yellow
I came running into T1, about 8 seconds ahead of the next runner. Team Happy Pants was out in the lead:
I'm just on the other side of the guy in green shorts
Matt was off on the ride. It had started raining again. And he said the course was hillier than he thought it was going to be. Let’s just say I was happy that I was able to put on some more clothes, talk with the other teams, and hang out in transition under the tent:
Monica, Mike, Anne, and Pharmie
Mike, be nice to your mother!
I saw 3 guys fly through T2, but they weren’t teams. They were just speedy, speedy individuals. Shortly after the first 3, Matt came running into transition:
Of course I had a dumb grin on my face...
...what did you expect?
I headed out on the 3 mile run. My cheering section was yelling! After about a 1/2 mile, I could finally see the 2nd and 3rd place individuals in front of me. They were 400 - 500 meters ahead of me. I was gunning for them.
Mile 1: 5:46. That was tough.
I turned up a little hill, and before too long, I was headed back towards the finish. That little hill hurt, and I was just trying to hang on. I was BARELY gaining on the 2 individuals in front of me.
Mile 2: 6:05. Dang, I was hoping to keep them all under 6.
Hurting, hurting, hurting. Trying to hold on. There was no way of reaching the 2 individual runners in front of me, but they pushed me nicely throughout.
I was nearing the finish. Matt and I were going to EASILY win the team competition. (We won by over 6 minutes.) Here I am coming to the line:
Cannon Lake Duathlon 2008, Team Results
#728: Team Happy Pants (Steve Stenzel, Matt Linder), St. Paul, MN
1.75 Mile Run - 9:45 (5:25/mile), 1st
T1 - 0:12, 1st
14 Mile Bike - 39:27 (21.2 mph), 1st
T2 - 0:10, 1st
3 Mile Run – 17:47 (5:56/mile), 1st
TOTAL: 1:07:20
1st place out of 4 teams
We had gotten first place among the teams, and we had a clean sweep of all 5 categories! We had the fastest run, T1, bike, T2, and run! Sweet!! (BTW, my run times were faster than ANYONE ELSE who was in the individual race. And Matt’s bike time was the 4th fastest among all the individuals.) We both had a great day!
Guess what? I brought the Nipguards to the race, but I forgot to put them on! But, thankfully, because I was wearing a good, tight shirt, I had no issues like last weekend. See? No blood:
(but one of the scabs rubbed off, which you
can see sitting just to the left of the nipple)
Double fisting brats
I dunno what to think of these
Hmmmmm....
So I bought 12 pieces for less than the cost of a 10 piece:
Do they think we’re dumb?!?
And BTW, the official photos from the Half IM last weekend (where I dressed as the Grim Reaper) are going to be up shortly, and I’ll be posting them as soon as I get them. They should be great! Thanks for reading everyone!!
I was thinking HOLY CRAP about how fast your mile times were... but then I saw it... the photo of you finishing. You just float the entire race, don't you? Is that how you're so fast? It's ok... I won't tell anyone your secret.
ReplyDeleteCongrats on the record-setting day. Too bad the weather sucked. Good thing the sun was out on your butt!!
ReplyDeleteOh man! I barely got through your post after reading about the pre-race meal. Snuffy's!! I miss that place. When I lived in Little Canada I ate there all the time. That's it! I'm coming to the Cities for a burger and malt at Snuffy's.
Glad to hear the nipsies made it through the day.
dude, you should wear some nipple guards.
ReplyDeleteemerging from the mostly lurking closet to say I LOVE YOUR POSTS.
ReplyDeletesure they funny
yes they informative
but mostly after Im done reading I always feel as though I can skip my workout...as though I did yours with you and it's time for MY McD breakfast trip.
MizFit
Can't wait for you to debut those "socks" in a future race.
ReplyDeleteI always get great nutritional tips from you, Steve. Will definitley be doing some Mickey D's math at my local outlet.
Nice race!
Just wondering if your students are still avid readers of your blog?
ReplyDeleteCongrats to team Happy Pants on a race well run/rode!!!
ReplyDeleteThose socks!!!! WOW! I'm thinking they may get more comments then the Grim Reaper costume!
No matter how many times I see those shorts I just freaking laugh my butt off. Too funny!
ReplyDeleteI have no remarks for your pace... it is insane!!
GREAT TEAM effort!
Hilarious race report, as always, Steve. Great job, Team Happy Pants!
ReplyDeleteYou've got some good jeans to be able to eat all that junk and a. not get fat. b. not have to poop all day long.
ReplyDeleteGreat job on the race, I cannot BELIEVE how fast you run. It IS insane!
ReplyDeleteSo are those socks.
Congrats on taking first place!
Winning is always nice, regardless of the field! Good job!
ReplyDeleteIt was near 100F here in South Texas yesterday. Crazy to see ya'll up there in hoodies.
Nice race... congrats on first place :)
ReplyDelete3 bikes per rack... sweet!!!!
Love the leggings..I know where i'm going tomorrow..hope I can find some like that.
ReplyDeletePlus..dude..how do you eat like that and look so fit?? I want to be on your eating program..:-))
Great job on the record setting event! I wonder if your BIL is related to a Nicole Linder I went to college with there in MN.
ReplyDeleteDamn...you run fast.
ReplyDeleteCongrats Team Happy Pants!! What a great fast Day!! I cannot believe how fast you run...
ReplyDeleteThanks for the comment..she can run..did you see the video post...Looks like you had a fun, fun,fun day...
ReplyDeleteEewww... rat mcnuggets... the chicken tenders aren't bad, but those nuggets are made out of who-knows-what!
ReplyDeleteNice job! Love the yellow socks.
ReplyDeletegreat job. And those socks with the shorts are somehow perfectly you!
ReplyDeletecongrats on the team win..
ReplyDeleteglad to know the bowl of sunshine did its job...could have been disaster....
see...i would never think of doing the math on the mcnuggets...i would buy the ten...
gotta see the official grim reaper photos from the half...i can imagine the official photo people looking at those..hilarious...
Congrats to team Happy Pants! :) Way to go!
ReplyDeleteCongrats to Team Happy Pants! You smoked everyone else's asses. :)
ReplyDeleteAs for your nippies, glad they didn't rub off more.
Love the yellow tights, you must wear them in your next running race or even a training run - just to see the reaction of others.
Lastly, you are one fast runner. How about we make a deal? You train me to run faster and I'll get you to swim faster.
Congrats!
Those socks are RIDICULOUS, but oh so funny!!!
ReplyDeleteGood job on the race.
Um, you eat a lot of crap! You must have an iron stomach!
ReplyDeleteI can't hardly believe how fast you are. Great job Team Happy Pants.
First of: Hahahahahaha about the title to your blog. Then, hahahahahaha about the rest of it, and an extra hahahahaha about the socks. Okay, I'm laughing AT you, not with you about the socks.
ReplyDeleteAnd holy crap you're a fast runner! Congratulations on your convincing victory over the 3 other teams and 4 cats that competed! I think you probably would have won, even if 5 teams showed up. Congratulations!
I'm in love with those socks but I have to ask - what is it with you and the frozen burritos???
ReplyDeleteYou guys rocked it.
ReplyDeleteLMAO at your "tights".
Oh and you should post pics of your BIL more often ;)
Reading your blog always makes me smile. Congrats to Team Happy Pants! Way to stick it to the competition. :)
ReplyDeleteCongratulations Team Happy Pants! You guys had a fantastic race. Those brats afterwards look good... I think those yellow socks look fantastic with the Bowl Fullof Sunshine!
ReplyDeleteLOL!!! Yeah!!! Those socks make you look hot LOL!!!
ReplyDeleteanother GREAT report!!! great job on the race, you guys rocked it!!
ReplyDeleteWow you guys are awesome! Love reading the reports and I love love love the socks!!!
ReplyDeleteI know your nipples better than my own. And I don't like that. Thanks for nothing.
ReplyDeletejeevus mary and joseph. this post makes me want to barf.. but not at the ridiculous amounts/choices of food you put in your mouth post-run...
ReplyDeletei want to barf at your mile splits.
how is that even possible!?! i don't understand. my mind doesn't compute running faster than 8:00 minute miles.
good gawd man!
Way to go Team Happy Pants!!!
ReplyDeleteI wish my legs looked that good in leggins!
daaaaang, 3 miles in 5.55? say wha? you were smokin!
ReplyDeletelove the socks. do they have a purpose other than being totally awesome?
seriously at any mintue a ball could just fall out of those shorts, are they really necessary?
ReplyDeleteYour second alternative title sounds like a cheesy porn flick.
ReplyDeleteAnd those socks...make you look like a chick. I thought you were exagerrating, but you're completely right. If you can pull that off, well, you are a braver man than I.
Congrats on the awesome race.
The leggings actually make your legs look like bird legs. The yellow color would go perfect with a chicken suit. Halloween is right around the corner. You ran a 1/2 marathon in a tri with a grim reaper, how bout' a half marathon (the monster dash) in a chicken suit. Not sure if I should be giving you any ideas.....
ReplyDeleteHave you ever had the suicide sunday from Snuffy's?! I haven't been there in ages, so I'm not even completely sure it still exists, but it's a challenge. You're up for a challenge, aren't you? Aren't you??!
ReplyDeleteBut you forgot to use the NipGuards Steve but oh well! Big time congrat goes out to Matt and yourself on cookin' the win in the first year Duathlon :-) also I'm glad to see the usual post-race burrito made it into the report as always...
ReplyDeleteare those regular socks or are they ahem, compression sucks? either way, they are hilarious. team happy pants needs to come race in new england! i want a sickle up my ass...ummm. right.
ReplyDeleteCongrats on another great race!
ReplyDeleteI found a good one for you but you probably have to travel for it:
http://cca.convio.net/site/PageServer?pagename=undy_landing
Very impressive race report. And those new socks....nice choice.
ReplyDeleteOn the race...awesome. One the socks...Big bird comes to mind...
ReplyDeleteWay to go Team Happy Pants! Excellent race and great job on setting the inaugural tone.
ReplyDeleteSo, on my race report about The Classic 10k, I was describing the outfit of the guy in front of me at the start line- yeah, it totally reminded me of the Bowl Full of Sunshine, ROFL!!
Oh, and about the socks- I only wish my legs looked half as good as yours, ha ha. Only you could get away with wearing those in public. = )
Awesome race and pics Steve..ok when you come out blurry in a run shot cause ur too fast I officially get depressed. LOL!
ReplyDelete